Honest Moments

March 24th 2014

“This is the first day of the rest if my life! Its gunna be alright, its gunna be alright. “… So apparently this isn’t a real song…but I’ve had it on repeat in my head and it’s been the theme song of my day. I finally feel like I’ve found my part of the class, my way in Australia and my routine in this new chapter of life. Disclaimer: I am still unforgettably aware of my difference in accent. I am still tired at random hours and awake at other random hours

But I am feeling more adjusted and more like I belong here. Coinciding I feel less like a tourist! Yay! …. Unless there’s a kangaroo…then I still freak out and take a million pictures of its every move.

Today I had the honor of ‘taking over’ the morning in Kindy and some of the afternoon. Despite my previous fears and nerves I am unmistakingly meant to be a teacher. If I’m honest, I buried my passion under my fears this past week. I also let environmental and uncontrollable circumstances rule my view toward teaching. Regrettably I also let this briefly change my feelings on teaching. Subsequently, I approached last week very close mindedly. Today though, when I jumped with two feet, into teaching for the entirety of the Ladybirds morning I re-discovered exactly the thing that delivers some of the most joy in my life. Teaching. I am called to be a teacher. Today wasn’t flawless by any extent of the imagination. In fact, to the untrained eye today was chaos in a classroom. But to a teachers heart it was gold. You see, this is what I rediscovered about myself. I love teaching. I’ll admit I was wildly unprepared for today and settled for mediocrity in my planning. I’d like to say it’s not because I was lazy but rather because I just didn’t know what to expect, how to plan and felt very little support in the whole process. It’s such a strange thing coming into someone else’s classroom and trying to adapt their style while putting a personal flare on the whole thing. I kind of when with the I’ll-do-what-she-does mantra and was hoping for the best.
When I arrived at school Jodie more or less if I was ready to take over, gulping I said yes. While my head nodded positively heart clenched with anxiety. Why was I so nervous? I wanted to do well and to feel comfortable and to take risks. Well if that’s not conflicting I don’t know what is. I can’t expect to be completely comfortable while taking risks and I can’t expect to ever excel if I don’t take risks. Anyway teaching went great and the kids, though concerned of where Jodie went, responded well. Later that day I was complimented on my teaching which was a huge confidence boost and yet another reminder that I can do this.

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Today was just a whole bundle of successes. I also wasn’t shocked when I opened my wallet to colorful money. After school I successfully navigated the bus system to the mall and grocery shopped on a budget. I used the bus system flying solo, with groceries and got home at a decent time. (no worries, Mama…I was safe 🙂 ) I got to teach in another country. I got compliments on my first day of teaching. One of my lil Kindy kids was in tears because she thought I was leaving. (tears are not the successful part, being part of the classroom in a positive way is) I made a delicious dinner. I got caught up on blogging and had a great porch chat with Sarah. Man, life is good!

Today was a lot of realizations, interpersonal honest moments, small new things and a break through into a new comfort zone. Thankful for days like these.

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